You don't have to be a star, baby, to be in my show
11:53 a.m. - 2003-01-01
My third attempt to have my family over to my house has been foiled. Sister-in-law on phone this morning,�Can everyone just come over here because your brother wants to watch football all day?� Me in my head, �Right, and since I haven�t had a television or a radio in my house since ALWAYS.� Me out loud, �Sure. I guess I�ll just bring everything over there.� So once again, they do not have to leave the confines of their home to come to my ghetto apartment. And even worse, I�m doing all the cooking. My mother? Oh, she�s all for it. Because God forbid the prodigal son should have to get out of his recliner in his Crib MTV home and have to drive to his sister�s ghetto-ass apartment.
Here�s how it went down. Yesterday, my mom says, �We�re all getting together New Year�s Day.� Me, �What time?� Her, �I don�t know.� Me, �Where?� Her, �I don�t know. Some people may come here, and some people may go out to eat.� Me, �That�s ridiculous. Why doesn�t everyone just come to my apartment, and I�ll cook a meal.� Her, �Well, call your brother.� Because God forbid a decision be made without his lumphead saying, �I don�t know. Ask my wife.� So, I leave them a phone message (they have caller I.D. after all). I tell mom I left them a message. She says, �Well, you and I will go to your apartment even if they don�t.� Course, that�s all out the window since wife of prodigal son has spoken.
So now I must pack everything up and go cook for my family. I�m actually looking forward to it. No, really I am.