I'm just sayin'...
8:14 p.m. - 2003-10-21
Okay, I'm a little disappointed in myself while being a little proud of myself at the same time. It's the love department again. I have pretty much figured out that my elevator doesn't go all the way to the top when it comes to men. I mean, that's good that I realize that. I have this obsessive complusive behavior when it comes to my crushes. Current crush: some random neighbor who is tall and cute. So, what do I do about it? I completely ignore him. I constantly peer out my window to see if he is outside or home or whatever. However, if I am outside and he is outside, I refuse to even look his way. He leaves for work at the same time I do. I think he works in construction because he comes home dirty. Anyway, the point is I already know the ending to this. I don't even want to know this guy. Let me tell you what will happen if I date this guy: Next thing you know, he will be living here in my apartment...because it makes more sense for him to live here than with the 6 other guys he lives with now. I'll start out all happy homemaker and he will begin to take advantage of it. Pretty soon, his job won't work out for one reason or another. He'll be in between jobs...forever. He'll be needing this and that like clothes for interviews and money for gas, and who else does he have but me to buy him these things? If I want to go out to eat, I'll have to take his ass along. I mean, it's like his life never existed before me. I'm all he fucking has. I'll start to hate his guts. Then I'll kick him out. Oh yeah, that bastard won't even get the time of day from me. You better mother fucking believe it!